The Emotional Bucket
How's your stress level? Any luck letting the stress go for a day?
We sometimes have a hard time with patience and letting go, too. And you know what? So does your dog!
The Emotional Bucket
We think of it as a “place” you store all of your feelings and reactions, BOTH positive and negative. Each interaction can start to fill up that emotional bucket.
It can be excitement, fear, anger, confusion, happiness, frustration, enthusiasm...ALL of them.
Each interaction adds a "thing" to your emotional bucket. Think of those "things" as rocks. Some are big, some are small. Sometimes we don't know what size they are. Some are gems, some are dirt. And, as our bucket fills up, it can get pretty hard to function because it's heavy and we can't see everything in it. We have to empty our bucket!
Empty the bucket: The need for restful recovery
The way the bucket gets emptied is through rest, relaxation and calm. What allows YOU to empty your bucket? Do you have a favorite calm activity? Maybe you take a hot bath. Go for a walk. Play music. Build Legos. Call a friend. Remember, what works for you may seem stressful to someone else so you have to have your personal list.
It's the same for dogs. Dogs empty their emotional bucket by being CALM. Sometimes it’s resting calm in their crate or bed. Sometimes it’s active calm like chewing on a toy or licking peanut butter off a frisbee. You have to help your dog find their way to be calm.
So…
If they were harassed at the dog park, we need to allow them to go home to rest, sometimes for a few days!
If they had an exciting time at the dog park, we go home to rest.
Just had a bunch of new guests over? Might be a good time to rest.
Did your dog ignore, growl or nip at a child? That’s SERIOUS! And time to take a real look at your dog’s stress level and let them empty that emotional bucket.
Rest for dogs means they need (one, all or some combination of):
A Quiet Space: designate a quiet, comfortable space for your dog like a cozy bed, blanket or crate.
Reduced Stimulation: Limit external stimuli such as loud noises or excessive activity. This is especially important for puppies because they really don’t know HOW to disengage from play yet. They will keep going until they are overwhelmed, which leads to biting, chewing and other destructive behaviors.
Consistent Routine: Dogs can thrive on predictability and routine. There is a downside of routine which can lead to predictable BAD behaviors, but we’ll cover that later. For now, establish a daily routine that includes lots of rest time in the same area.
Gentle Activities: Engaging in calm activities helps your dog learn they don’t always have to be UP and READY to PARTY! Calm petting or massage helps them relax. Also, calm chewing activities can help keep them occupied while resting - like licking peanut butter from a frisbee!
Be aware of your dog’s stress level
We encourage you and your dog to play training games for short amounts of time throughout the day. We want to teach them that learning is fun and rewarding and doesn’t lead to overwhelm!
Helping your dog to find balance between excitement and relaxation is an essential part of being a caring and responsible pet owner. By understanding the concept of the emotional bucket and prioritizing restful recovery, you're nurturing your dog's emotional well-being.
Think about your own education
Many of us grew up in schools that were not fun so we associate learning with “boring” or "hard work". And that can stop us from continued learning throughout life. If you’re taught that learning is frusting, repetitious and anxiety producing, why would you ever want to continue?
Well, dog training shouldn't be "hard work" either. It's about building a relationship with your dog so you are BOTH fun to be around.
If you think of both you and your dog as learners, rather than you as the trainer and the dog as the only learner, you can tune in to the stress levels of BOTH you and your dog a little easier and know when to end the play/training sessions.
At Casa Luna Canines, we
keep training sessions short so your dog doesn't get overwhelmed and frustrated.
work with dogs cognition “brains” so they can choose to be calm or active at the right time.
train FOR situations, not IN situations by gradually increasing where we play our games so we introduce distractions slowly.
This may all feel overwhelming to you as well.
So, go do something nice for yourself. As promised, we'll help you build a relationship with your dog that is based on mutual trust, respect and fun.
Go rest. There is always more learning!
