“You know better than that…”

And other things that are lost on our dogs.

Despite being incredibly cute and furry, our dogs can sometimes drive us into frustration!

And despite being slightly obnoxious and getting into mischief, a dog is actually NOT spiteful and vindictive creatures.

To be spiteful requires a certain amount of desire to do wrong. To be vindictive necessitates planning to get revenge. Dogs act in the moment. Much more about impulse and spontaneity. So, yes, we could call them opportunistic a-hats (excuse the language inference) and be spot on!

Your dog does remember a lot of stuff, and some of it we wish they’d forget. For instance, I guarantee your dog will remember where she saw that dead bird yesterday. And, she’ll run over and roll in it the moment you let her off leash…and usually just AFTER a bath or trip to the groomer…despite the fact you’ve told her many times that you’re not pleased by this behavior.

It’s a crime of opportunity! That smell is just too good to resist!

Sometimes your dog does a behavior that is out of character simply because anxiety or fear took over. Perhaps your dog is perfectly house-trained. But one day, you leave for a little longer than usual, or you left over a period of time that the sun went down, or he heard a weird car noise when you were out of the house, and he relieved himself on the bedroom floor. Same thing if he tipped over the garbage can and at the trash, even though he NEVER does that!

He’s not plotting revenge. He is probably just expressing his anxiety, fear or…boredom…so he’s doing things he wouldn’t normally do.

I bet you’ve done this kind of thing before, too. Have you ever bitten your fingernails? Chewed the end of a pen? Picked at a scab? You KNOW you “shouldn’t” do this, but it’s your anxiety, or nervousness, or HABIT!

Habits form when quirky, socially deviant, bad, unnatural (whatever label you want to put on it) behavior actually HELPED at one point. It was rewarding so it was repeated again…and again…and again…and again. Then there is less “moral judgement” put on the behavior. It’s just a habit.

Dogs can be similar. We call this Dog Law!

Simple Dog Law

If it works, I’ll do it again.

If it doesn’t work, I won’t do it again.

"It works” means the reward, outcome or consequence was great and it was worth the effort the behavior took. “It doesn’t work” means the reward was not worth the effort. This is actually part of Thorndike’s Principle of Learning and applies to human behavior as well.

So, lot’s of your dog’s behaviors start with following and impulse or instinct, and the consequence is great, so it’s easily learned they should and will do that again. And if they get to do it again, they will do it again…and again…and again. You get it!

It’s important to note, the consequence being “good” or “bad” is from the viewpoint of the Do-er (in this case, your dog) NOT the brain of the judger (in this case, you!). So, rolling all over a dead bird just after a bath is a WONDERFUL, SATISFYING experience to many, many dogs.

Relieving themselves on the floor may have originally been an act of fear or anxiety. BUT, when it got mom yelling and chasing them around the house…BINGO! That’s a fun game for many dogs. They may not have interpreted your yelling and running after them as punishment. They may have actually had fun!

So, an unwanted behavior may have been initiated by a fear, anxiety or impulse moment. But the consequence is what determines if it should be done again.

And let’s be clear, I am NEVER EVER advocating you, or any human, artificially create a “negative consequence” for your dog by way of punishment. That is simply abusive intimidation and has no place in the relationship with your dog. You can create a consequence that makes the dog believe the behavior didn’t work by ignoring it, staying calm or diverting your dog to another activity.

But what about when my dog goes to the bathroom inside the house?

He knows better than that!

First of all, understand that yelling or punishing your dog if they use your new rug as a toilet may NOT stop the behavior. Usually, our human punishment comes long after the act so all your dog learns is that when there is excrement on the floor, the human gets a bit crazy and intimidating! It is usually not a learning moment of “aha! I created that smelly pile and the human does not like it so I shouldn’t do that here in the house again (even though they praise me and pick it up when I’m outside!”

Second, if they really DO “know better”, then they wouldn’t have done it. So the only place left to look for the answer is, for better or worse, in the mirror.

The Dog is not the responsible party.

Who IS responsible for most of our dog’s undesirable and unwanted behavior? You.

If you leave your dog alone too long with no boundaries and nothing to do but follow her instincts, then of COURSE he’ll start researching new scents. If you don’t let your dog out in time to do his business, he’ll find the next best place that slightly resembles the grass or rocks he’s used to using. If you left your dog inside too long, he had no choice!

It’s your responsibility to teach your dog to entertain themselves with appropriate behavior, to go outside when needed or to signal you it’s time (and you LISTEN), or to teach them to “COME HERE” because it’s rewarding, or to “WAIT” until you can get the leash and harness out.

Sure, there are a few situations that dogs develop behaviors, like toileting in the house, that are 100% not related to human behavior, but that means it’s related to a medical or physical need. And, oops, that’s also your responsibility to take care of.

The whole point of this is that all too often we blame our dogs for behavior with thoughts like “they know what they did” and “they know better than that”, when in fact, they are simply acting out of instinct or they have learned something that we inadvertently taught them was an okay behavior.

There are always ways we humans can learn more and do better with our dogs, so feel free to ask your questions (after you’ve done some self reflection, of course).

Or, easier, go ahead and get Training Tips and Tricks by signing up for the Paws and Success Newsletter below. You got this! We believe in you.

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